S*** the President Says – 10/19/2020

Ladies and gentlemen, behold, some s*** the president said during the previous week:

We begin this week with a tweet I’ve been looking at for seven days now, wondering what in the world it’s supposed to mean. Where would Illinois go? Why is it sad? Why is the stagnant geography of a state any sort of justification to vote for or against anyone? What does he mean? Take a quick guess – will things get more coherent from here, or less?

From geography we move on now to healthcare, or the lack thereof. The Trump healthcare plan is like the Loch Ness Monster or Bigfoot: there’s been plenty of rumors and promises but no documentary evidence of any of these things. Here’s Joe Biden’s plan. Maybe you’ll agree with it, maybe not, but it’s a real plan written by adults. Oh, and the Trump administration is arguing in court right now to invalidate the law guaranteeing insurance for those with pre-existing conditions.

When you’re down big in the polls, time’s running out, the country thinks you’re a jerk who spends too much time on Twitter, and they doesn’t trust you on the coronavirus just as cases start to spike once again, you know what it’s time for? How about a Twitter fight with the country’s most trusted coronavirus expert! Yeehaw! Oh well, I’m sure he’s just blowing off a little steam. Someone will convince him not to do this sort of thing again. Right?

“‘He’ll listen to the scientists.’ If I listened totally to the scientists we would right now have a country that would be in a massive depression instead of – we’re like a rocket ship. Take a look at the numbers.

10/18/2020 Trump rally in Carson City, NV.

My God, a feud with science really is our president’s closing campaign message. Maybe not an obvious choice, but this is one of my favorite Trump quotes of all-time: confidently dismissing life-saving science, insisting he’s right by pointing not to anything health-related but rather the economy (about which he’s wrong) by comparing it to a rocket ship. Who makes rocket ships? Scientists!

I said, ‘First Lady, am I the most handsome president ever?’ ‘Yes, absolutely.’ I said, ‘Who could top me?’ She said, ‘Well, JFK was pretty good looking but nothing like you. Nothing like you, darling.’

10/18/2020 Trump rally in Carson City, NV.

You be the judge:

This has a lot: there’s the flashy adjectives, some ALL CAPS, some kind of inside joke about a percentage, but it’s missing one thing. There is no hint of why Hunter Biden’s laptop is supposed to be bad for his father. Your guess is as good as mine.

Now here’s another reference but still no clue what the problem is supposed to be. Is it a crime to own a laptop? Where can I go to find out more information?

Of course. The President of the United States is getting his information from the TV.

[Amy Coney Barrett]’s toying with those Democrat[ic] evil people. They’re evil.

10/15/2020 Trump rally in Greenville, NC.

It just wouldn’t be a week in the life of our president without a bunch of “Lock him up,” “lock her up,” “they’re all traitors,” and now “evil people.” Conspiratorial outrage is nourishment for the conservative mind.

It’s the enemy of the people. Our media is the enemy of the people. It’s very, very dangerous, what they do…I will deliver optimism, opportunity, and hope.

10/16/2020 Trump rally in Ocala, FL.

Got that? Anthony Fauci can’t throw a fastball. All the scientists are jerks. All of my political opponents should be thrown in jail. Democrats are evil. The media is your enemy. Anyway follow me for more optimism.

That’s our report for this week. Be sure to check out the links for more info on any particular topic and, as always, thanks for reading.

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