Ladies and gentlemen, behold, some s*** the president said during the previous week:
We’ll have fun as we go along this week; there will be jokes. First, though, a rant about the wrongest damn thing to cross Donald Trump’s Twitter feed since at least two days prior: (1) There is no difference between mail-in voting and absentee voting. (2) Donald Trump doesn’t know s*** about history so he has no frame of reference for what the most inaccurate or fraudulent election would even be. (3) Universal mail-in voting is already used by seven states plus DC and has been for years. It’s fine. (4) On what planet can the same person constantly telling us our country should open everything up also suggest delaying the one thing that may deliver us from this cascading hellscape? No. We are not delaying the election. It’s coming, and if there is a God it will bring a cold splash of reality and law and order to the one man who needs it most: the guy who probably didn’t even realize he has no authority to delay the election in the first place. Next!
7/28/2020 coronavirus briefing at the White House.
“She” is Dr. Stella Emmanuel, a doctor whom believes – seriously – that doctors make medicine from alien DNA and that reproductive problems are caused by having sex with demons in your sleep. She came across our president’s radar when she claimed masks don’t stop COVID-19 from spreading and that hydroxychloroquine cures it. Trump heard this, liked it, and retweeted it to his 80+ million Twitter followers. Why on Earth would a president do that?
“I thought her voice was an important voice, but I know nothing about her.”
7/28/2020 coronavirus briefing at the White House.
What an incredible sentence.
Sure, let’s all take a break and support Patio Pizza. Only a 7 hour, 30 minute drive from Erie, PA! I’m sure it’s the best pizza ever and not shown here just because its owner said something nice about Trump on Fox Business channel.
“There are those that say you can test too much. You do know that?”
7/31/2020 interview with Jonathan Swan.
No. No one has ever said that. Donald Trump himself is tested at least daily, as is everyone with whom he comes into contact. This led to the inevitable follow-up question by Axios’ Jonathan Swan: “Who?” To which our president responded:
7/31/2020 interview with Jonathan Swan.
Secret manuals containing instructions not to test too many people for the coronavirus? I’d sure like to see those. This led to the next obvious follow-up from Jonathan Swan: “What manuals?”
7/31/2020 interview with Jonathan Swan.
In the end, our president couldn’t name anyone that recommended capping coronavirus testing. Making vague references to “books” is the best we’ve got, which is a shame because there are, like, a lot of books.
7/29/2020 in Midland, TX.
I don’t usually consider myself radical, but, yeah. This is exactly what I want because this is how democracy works. I want to tear down the Trump presidency on Nov. 3rd as well as anyone in office who supports him, and transfer power to the sane and competent. If that makes me radical, then, whatever.
7/29/2020 in Midland, TX.
Whoa, no. That is not what we want at all, and it’s strange for the guy who once proclaimed his love for Kim Jong-Un to speak as our purported champion of American values. Look, lies need to have some veneer of believability. After eight relatively tranquil years of Obama, Americans are not scared of a Biden presidency.
This is a fine example of our president telling on himself. He’ll occasionally talk about how busy he is and how much time he spends reading, but I think we all know by now it’s a toxic stew of golf, Fox News, and Twitter.
That’s our report for this week. Be sure to check out the links for more info on any particular topic and, as always, thanks for reading.
Idiotville 