S*** the President Says – 7/22/2019

Ladies and gentlemen, behold, some s*** the President said during the previous week:

Welcome to Week 2 of the “Is it racist?” game the President refuses to acknowledge he’s lost. Regarding this tweet, bones aren’t usually the racist part of people, anyway. It’s the brain. The thoughts. Plus maybe the little thumb bones you use to tweet “go back to your country” at black and brown people.

More accurately, Dems were moved to defend the aforementioned lawmakers’ right to exist in America despite not being white. It’s not exactly an “embrace” of socialism or hating America to just not be racist.

If there were a big list of things I don’t care about, “who built the cages” would be right on top. How did the kids get into the cages? Now I care. Aren’t Republicans the party of “Guns don’t kill people; people kill people” anyway? Since when do we blame the tool, as if all the cages were like venus fly traps and these kids just wandered in and all the cages locked on their own from the inside. No. These kids were put there, by the Trump Administration, as a direct result of the “Zero Tolerance” policy announced by then-AG Jeff Sessions.

President Trump keeps conflating himself with the country he leads. He can’t distinguish between the two, so he views any criticism of himself or his policies as anti-American. This is completely backwards, because there is nothing more American than working within the system, as these congresswomen are doing, to advance your views precisely when you feel your country is moving in the wrong direction.

Wait, are these women entitled to their opinions or aren’t they? Last week they should go back to the countries of their ancestors, but now they can stay? It’s almost like this whole thing wasn’t thought all the way through.

Oh, I get it. He was watching Fox News again and rewinding it to type what the bad John Kennedy was saying. I can’t believe there’s a Republican John Kennedy. Imagine if AOC’s name was really Ayn Rand. Anyway, apparently Fox News is that Republican safe space where “Make America Great Again” and “love it or leave it” aren’t a giant contradiction.

You can’t speak about our country the way those four congress[wo]men – they said, “garbage.” They say things about Israel that’s so bad I’m not even going to repeat them right now.7/19/2019 at the White House.

I’m guessing “I’m not going to repeat them right now” is code for, “I have no idea what they said anymore.” Like when you were a kid and your friend would say, “If you don’t know by now, I’m not going to tell you.” In fact, none of the aforementioned congresswomen called America “garbage,” either. President Trump has been lashing out at these women of color for almost two weeks now, and he has no idea why.

It was only recently that — well, I mean, “recently,” but lots of warnings for the last period of time.  And then you have statutory constraints where you can only go here, here, here.  And we did that, right at the beginning.  And now they’re paying a very big price, and hopefully we’ll see what happens.” 7/15/2019 at the White House.

This is vintage Trump. Can anyone tell what in the world he’s talking about? I’ll even give you a hint: the topic was tariffs on Chinese imports. How recently? What warnings? What period of time? What statutory constraints? What did he do from the beginning? What does he hope to see happens? What the hell is he talking about? No one knows.

We’re going to have good relationships with China. President Xi is a friend of mine. He’s a good friend. I used to say he’s a good friend; we’re probably not as close now.7/15/2019 at the White House.

He’s a friend. No, a good friend. No, not a good friend. Used to be good. Now just friend. It’s another example of President Trump having no idea what the actual policy is supposed to be, so he fills up entire answers with filler about meaningless personal tidbits. This particular one reminds me of that time he ranked all the Fox News anchors in order of their personal loyalty to him. Weird.

We’ve been losing four, five – and even more than that – hundred billion. Think of it: five hundred billion dollars a year, o China…So, essentially, we rebuilt China.7/15/2019 at the White House.

Here is at least some attempt at a policy rationale regarding trade with China. It’s bonkers. We do indeed have a big trade deficit with China, but we shouldn’t expect or even want this to balance. Think of it this way: you have a huge trade surplus with your employer – they pay you, you never pay them – but a huge trade deficit with your grocery store. No one thinks of their grocery store as continually ripping them off. If you did, you could just shop somewhere else. China is our largest trading partner.


That’s our report for this week. Be sure to check out the links for more info on any particular topic and, as always, thanks for reading.

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