Ladies and gentlemen, behold, an April Fool’s Day edition of S*** the President Says. It’ll be no different than any other edition, because with Donald Trump as our president it’s April Fool’s Day all the time. Let’s get started:
Right after President Trump said this, reporters began asking if Republicans, you know, have a plan. Just then, Trump and Mitch McConnell began pointing at each other like Harry Dunne and Lloyd Christmas, Mitch pulled his cape over both he and Trump, and they both disappeared in a puff of smoke. The Republican healthcare plan remains like Sasquatch – millions believe in it, but no one has seen it.
If this takes less than one hour, it’s hard to imagine why Republicans didn’t do this in the two entire years they had control of both houses of Congress and the White House. Maybe because it’s not our immigration laws that are weak and very stupid, but in fact our president’s knowledge of them.
I have no idea what lie Adam Schiff supposedly told or what anyone thinks he leaked, but I do want a world where politicians have to resign as soon as they lie. Donald Trump would’ve been out, at the latest, on Day Two under this standard after proclaiming his was the biggest inaugural crowd in history. It wasn’t close.
“The insurance policy – just in case Hillary Clinton lost, they wanted an insurance policy against me. And what we were playing out until just recently was the insurance policy. They wanted to do a subversion. It was treason. It was really treason.” 3/27/2019 phone interview with Sean Hannity.
No, the “insurance policy” was the lawful FBI investigation into legitimate wrongdoing that resulted in felony charges for 13 Russians and half a dozen Trump campaign members. Nobody is subverting anything. If the President knew anything about how laws worked, he would be comfortable that they were followed in this case, instead of wildly throwing around accusations of treason like a crazy person.
“If the Republican Party had done this to the Democrats, if we had done this to President Obama, you’d have 100 people in jail right now and it would be treason.“ 3/27/2019 phone interview with Sean Hannity.
Remember, Trump really did accuse Obama of illegally wiretapping him. He’s tried to direct the law enforcement apparatus to investigate his political opponents, over and over again in public and in private. Trump suggests these things should be viewed as legitimate scandals, and I agree.
“This was an attempted takeover of our government, of our country, an illegal takeover.” 3/27/2019 phone interview with Sean Hannity.
I’ll never get used to this whole act where anything going against Trump has to be not only wrong but illegitimate, illegal, corrupt. It’s exhausting, and a really unhealthy way to look at the world. In Trump’s telling, Mueller was appointed to install Hillary Clinton as the new President, laws be damned, and all Republicans in Congress would be replaced by Rachel Maddow. In reality, Mueller was appointed by one of Trump’s own hires and seems to have portrayed the President’s actions in a nuanced and fair way: bad actions but not illegal ones. Time to move on from all this apocalyptic talk.
The news isn’t fake. They haven’t lost credibility. The Russia investigation was neither illegal, performed by Democrats, nor a witch hunt. Trump is not America’s all time favorite president. And TV ratings of news broadcasts are not indicative of their quality – just like if WWE Raw had higher ratings than actual wrestling, it’d still be fake.
Now wait a minute. Tucker Carlson’s conversation here was in regards to media coverage of the Russia investigation, and the criticism is entirely wrong-headed. Remember Kellyanne Conway on 12/18/2016, asked whether anyone on the Trump campaign had any contact with Russians? “That is just not only inaccurate and false, but it does undermine our democracy.” We now know at least 17 Trump campaign members had over 100 Russian contacts. If the mere suggestion of Russian contact “undermined our democracy,” was the media supposed to ignore these 100 contacts and the two years of everyone lying about it? When the President said he fired the FBI Director because of “this Russia thing,” was the media supposed to look the other way? What should the media have done differently?
Personally, I gave up on having heroes when Brett Favre sent dick pics to that New York Jets reporter. Hero worship leads to obsessing over someone’s virtues and overlooking their faults, and that isn’t healthy. Everyone has faults and should be judged in their totality. This includes Robert Mueller, and it includes Donald Trump. I trust Robert Mueller’s report because I trust his resume. I want to see the report before celebrating or sulking, and anyone who doesn’t (a group including our president) isn’t being smart.
“The Russia witch hunt was a plan by those who lost the election to try and illegally regain power by framing innocent Americans, many of them.” -3/28/2019 Trump rally in Grand Rapids, MI.
Remember, impeaching and removing Trump would install Vice President Mike Pence as our first ever robot-President, which undermines this entire argument. The argument isn’t really designed for people who think things through, though. Its purpose is to wallow in victimhood.
That’s our report for this week. Be sure to check out the links for more info on any particular topic and, as always, thanks for reading.
Idiotville 