Ladies and gentlemen, s*** the President said during the previous week:
- “I see Schumer is already criticizing my State of the Union speech, even though he hasn’t seen it yet. He’s just upset that he didn’t win the Senate, after spending a fortune, like he thought he would. Too bad we weren’t given more credit for the Senate win by the media!” 2/5/2019 Trump tweet. We lead off this week with a sick burn on Chuck Schumer, just hours before the President delivered his unity-themed State of the Union address. There are two things our president hates: Democrats, and irony.
- “Well, it happened again. Amy Klobuchar announced that she is running for President, talking proudly of fighting global warming while standing in a virtual blizzard of snow, ice and freezing temperatures. Bad timing. By the end of her speech she looked like a Snowman(woman)!” 2/10/2019 Trump tweet. Im sorry, but only an idiot would think snow in Minnesota disproves global warming. I just picture all the world’s scientists gathering together and poring over their climate research, working toward agreement on what the expected warming is and what policies should be implemented, then a dramatic burst through the door by a breathless errand boy saying, “WAIT! Don’t send the report! It just snowed in Minnesota!” Then they all have a good laugh and send the report.
- “Democrats at the top are killing the Great State of Virginia. If the three failing pols were Republicans, far stronger action would be taken. Virginia will come back HOME Republican) in 2020!” 2/7/2019 Trump tweet. There is a legitimate crisis in Virginia in which the current governor and the next two in line (all Dems) are all facing scandals that may well push all of them from office. Of course, hearing President Trump criticize anyone else on this front is a bit rich, what with every aspect of his professional life under criminal investigation. As for the “if they were Republican” bit, the most recent Republican Governor of Virginia was convicted of 11 felony corruption counts, and never resigned. If that didn’t “kill Virginia” I like their chances of living through this, too.
- “African Americans are very angry at the double standard on full display in Virginia!” 2/10/2019 Trump tweet. Yeah, if there’s anyone qualified to speak on the attitudes of African Americans, it’s the guy that got 8% of the black vote in 2016 and promised to win 95% of it in 2020.
- “The U.S. will soon control 100% of ISIS territory in Syria. @CNN (do you believe this?).” 2/10/2019 Trump tweet. The president is adamant that all our troops will soon be leaving Syria, so it would be just as accurate to say the U.S. will soon control 0% of ISIS territory in Syria.
- “So now Congressman Adam Schiff announces, after having found zero Russian Collusion, that he is going to be looking at every aspect of my life, both financial and personal, even though there is no reason to be doing so. Never happened before! Unlimited Presidential Harassment….“ 2/7/2019 Trump tweet. There’s a lot wrong with this one. Adam Schiff has only chaired the House Intelligence Committee for one month, first of all – not a lot of time to peel the collusion onion. There’s plenty evidence of collusion, for another. Richard Nixon might also quibble with the notion that no president has faced such financial and personal investigation: tax evasion was among his articles of impeachment.
- “….The Dems and their committees are going “nuts.” The Republicans never did this to President Obama, there would be no time left to run government. I hear other committee heads will do the same thing. Even stealing people who work at White House! A continuation of Witch Hunt!” 2/7/2019 Trump tweet. The Republicans never did this to Obama? Is this guy serious? Here’s a decent list of Obama-era investigations from The Washington Post. Less than a week after the 2010 elections swept Republicans to power in the House, incoming committee chair Darrell Issa said of investigating Obama: “I want seven hearings a week, times 40 weeks.” For anyone with mathophobia, that’s 280 oversight hearings in a single year. Issa tried his best but came up with zero criminal charges, just 199 less than the Mueller probe already has. They launched eight – eight – separate investigations into the Benghazi attack. It took so long it started out as Obama’s fault in 2012 only to be Hillary’s fault when 2016 rolled around, when it was still under investigation. Trump himself might recall sending investigators to Hawaii to look into Obama’s birth certificate.
- “PRESIDENTIAL HARASSMENT! It should never be allowed to happen again!” 2/7/2019 Trump tweet. Well don’t sound nervous or anything.
- “It is all a GIANT AND ILLEGAL HOAX, developed long before the election itself, but used as an excuse by the Democrats as to why Crooked Hillary Clinton lost the Election! Someday the Fake News Media will turn honest & report that Donald J. Trump was actually a GREAT Candidate!” 2/8/2019 Trump tweet. This is a rather honest display of what Donald Trump wants so desperately to believe. He just wants to be loved. No, he is loved. He’s already loved. He’s been loved all along, by everyone. Just someday, they’ll finally admit it to the world. Admit it in humiliating fashion. Of course the negativity is a hoax. Everything bad is fake. Everything. They’re all going to fess up any day now. They will.
- “Gallup Poll: “Open Borders will potentially attract 42 million Latin Americans.” This would be a disaster for the U.S. We need the Wall now!” 2/10/2019 Trump tweet. Well, aren’t there options besides “open borders” and “giant, medieval wall?” Nobody wants open borders.
That’s our report for this week. Be sure to check out the links if you’re curious about any particular topic and, as always, thanks for reading.
Idiotville 