S*** the President Says – 12/17/2018

Ladies and gentlemen, behold, s*** the President said during the previous week:

• “Democrats can’t find a Smocking Gun tying the Trump campaign to Russia after James Comey’s testimony. No Smocking Gun…No Collusion. @FoxNews That’s because there was NO COLLUSION…” 12/10/2018 Trump tweet. This reminded me of that time Sarah Palin made up the word “refutiated” then told everyone she meant to. But wait! According to Urban dictionary, “Smocking is body painting for sexual gratification.” Oh, God. Stop the investigation!
• “So now the Dems go to a simple private transaction, wrongly call it a campaign contribution, which it was not (but even if it was, it is only a CIVIL CASE, like Obama’s – but it was done correctly by a lawyer and there would not even be a fine. Lawyer’s liability if he made a mistake, not me). Cohen just trying to get his sentence reduced. WITCH HUNT!” 12/10/2018 Trump tweet (continued from above). Maybe Trump’s crime recognition is just that terrible, but imagine the following. A prosecutor charges you with a crime. You meet with your lawyer. Look at all your options. Plead guilty. Then some media mogul admits to being part of the plot and pleads guilty, too. Now what do you think the chances are of it falling to Donald Trump to realize there was actually no crime here? Less than zero?

• “Remember, Michael Cohen only became a “Rat” after the FBI did something which was absolutely unthinkable & unheard of until the Witch Hunt was illegally started. They BROKE INTO AN ATTORNEY’S OFFICE! Why didn’t they break into the DNC to get the Server, or Crooked’s office?” 12/16/2018 Trump tweet. Forget about the misdirection and the president sounding like a mob boss. He doesn’t even get the difference between executing a search warrant, which is quite legal, and illegally breaking and entering. That’s like not seeing the difference between crime and, I don’t know, getting made fun of on SNL.
• “A REAL scandal is the one sided coverage, hour by hour, of networks like NBC & Democrat spin machines like Saturday Night Live. It is all nothing less than unfair news coverage and Dem commercials. Should be tested in courts, can’t be legal? Only defame and belittle! Collusion?” 12/16/2018 Trump tweet. Unfair? Life’s unfair. Having a president that doesn’t read or know anything and committed a crime to get in office isn’t fair. Media criticism is fair. NO COLLUSION!

• “They gave General Flynn a great deal because they were embarrassed by the way he was treated – the FBI said he didn’t lie and they overrode the FBI. They want to scare everybody into making up stories that are not true by catching them in the smallest of misstatements. Sad!” 12/13/2018 Trump tweet. Everyone knows Flynn lied. Flynn even knows – it’s why he pled guilty. Somehow, the president thinks the FBI is trying to punish people for “small” lies to get them to tell bigger ones? That’s a bad theory.

• “Wow, but not surprisingly, ObamaCare was just ruled UNCONSTITUTIONAL by a highly respected judge in Texas. Great news for America!” 12/14/2018 Trump tweet. “Wow, but not surprisingly” sums up the Trump era quite nicely. We already ran a long piece on this court ruling, and I’d encourage you to check it out if you haven’t already seen it.
• “Let’s not do a shutdown, Democrats – do what’s right for the American people!” 12/13/2018 Trump tweet. Two things here: First, Republicans control both houses of Congress until January. Funding bills require just a simple majority in both houses, so Republicans could prevent a shutdown on their own. Funding an unnecessary wall on the southern border would require 60 votes in the Senate, thus it is the president insisting on getting his way or shutting down the government. Secondly…
• “I’ll be the one to shut it down. I will take the mantle. And I will shut it down for border security.” 12/11/2018 in a meeting with Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer. Unreal.

• “Another very bad terror attack in France. We are going to strengthen our borders even more. Chuck and Nancy must give us the votes to get additional border security!” 12/12/2018 Trump tweet. The next time a French terrorist tries to the breach the southern U.S. border, let’s build the wall.
• “James Comey just totally exposed his partisan stance by urging his fellow Democrats to take back the White House in 2020. In other words, he is and has been a Democrat. Comey has no right heading the FBI at any time, but especially after his mind exploded!” 12/11/2018 Trump tweet. Comey was enough of a Republican to be George W. Bush’s deputy attorney general. Then Republicans went full crazy and elected Donald Trump. Then they acted like Comey was the problem when he tried to ring the alarm on Trump’s illegal behavior. If his mind did explode after all that, who could blame him.

That’s it for this week. Remember to check out the links if you’re curious for more info on any particular topic and, as always, thanks for reading.